Thursday, April 9, 2009

Baby Bangs

Ok, so this one time I got pregnant, had a baby and then, my hair had a personal crisis. Seriously, what's the deal? I had normal hair before I got pregnant.

Not too thick, not too thin, just normal.

Then, I started taking prenatals and VOILA! I had really thick, and shiny I might add, blond hair. So thick, that it took Julee 3 hours or a little longer to color and cut my hair. Not because Julee is slow, but because I had 70,067,48,594,749, strands of hair.

It was really thick. A good thick.

Not that "you need to go on a TLC show and get a makeover thick" but shampoo commercial thick. I loved my hair. Julee didn't though. Every time she would have to color it she would tell me she wished some of it would fall out. Everyone else besides her would comment on my hair and I was rather proud. It was quite strong as well. Like I could throw it Rapunzel style right out the window and someone could climb up it. I was in hair heaven.

Then, one day at my monthly appointment, my doctor, who had a 9 month old at the time, came into the exam room. She started pulling long hairs off her white coat. No biggie. Right? She looked right at me and said, "see what you have to look forward to? 9 months later and I'm still losing my hair."


Did I sign up for hair loss? No.
Was I planning on losing my hair? No.
Did I need to shed my hair for the summer? No.

Pretty sure the vote I took amongst myself was unanimous.
No. I was not going to lose my hair.

So then, I had Brody.
That sweet, precious, make me drool over you, baby boy. Goodness.

The hair then had different issues. Yes, it was still thick, and it may have possibly been shiny, but I didn't try to find out. Why? Well, my hair spent approximately 9 weeks in a ponytail. Often a very dirty ponytail. Who the heck has time to fix their hair when they have a newborn?

Wait. Don't answer that.
I don't need to know about you girls who skipped a nap to Chi your hair.

3 months post Brody..... I was in the bathroom one morning and I started to brush my hair out to dry it and OH MY WORD. The hair started falling out.


I immediately panicked and started saying, "oh my, I'm going bald. I'm going bald. I'm going bald." I got my phone a snapped a quick pic of the wad-o-hair in my hand and sent it to Julee with the words, "I'm going bald." To which she replied, "no you are not."

Thanks for the encouragement.

The next week, she colored my hair in a record time of 2:45. Why? Because I was missing 1/6 of my hair. Her wish came true. It fell out. She finally admitted that it was falling out. I think she said, "whoa, you really are losing your hair."

Thanks again for the encouragement.

This went on for 2 months. I have no idea how I lost soooo much hair and still had some. I would get so frustrated cleaning the house because my hair was everywhere. Honestly, I could make you gag with stories. If I haven't made you gag already.

Fast forward to 2 weeks ago.... Getting my hair colored again. Yes, I go often. We noticed these new baby hairs growing in the front. They were short. So short that you can't even color them. I didn't really feel bothered by them. There were just a few and at least my hair was growing and not falling out.

So last week, I looked in the mirror, and it looked like someone took a weed eater to my bangs. They are so short and fine and awkward. Oh my word. I feel like I have acne again and people are staring except now it's in the form of these little hairs that have a mind of their own.

Y'all. I look sad.

Seriously, it looks like some small child took scissors to my hair.

Do you want proof? Really do you?
Ok. Here it is.

See what I am talking about?? Weed eater head. Gag.

So from what I hear this stage lasts a good while. Great. I guess I better get comfy in my forehead wings. Yep. You should see them when the wind blows. Hot!

I have no words. Maybe I should just get a cool head band and see if it will hold those puppies back. Or maybe I can just slick them back with some hair gel. That would look better, right?

I'll probably just rock the baby bangs for the next few months. They are my newest spring accessory.

Oh, in case I left you wondering. He was soooo worth them.


Laura Ann said...

So Gavin probably thinks his Mommy has lost it this morning as I am nursing him, because I am laughing hysterically at this post.

Let me just say been there...done that. As a matter of SIDEBURNS have just finally grown out from having Emma 21 months ago....yes, I am not kidding I could have given Elvis a run for his money back in the day!

I can already see my hair breaking off and I can not stand it.

I switched to Over the counter vitamins after I had Emma and continued nursing...but this time I had my Dr. write me a prescription for more vitamins in hopes of salvaging some of my hair.

I am so with you on the dirty pony tail too...oh let me not forget the few bobby pins I throw in there too to try to give it a different look (ha ha). Well, some days I even find myself with one of Emma's barrettes or hairbows in at the end of the day.

But at the end of the are so is all worth it...I would go bald if that is what it meant to have my sweet healthy babies.

Lilly, Matt, and Sara said...

Yes we do give up just a little bit of our beauty for parenthood, don't we?? I mean I finally decided that I WILL shower everyday whether Lilly loves it or not--but actual fixing of the hair is still optional most days!

Also, I shed like crazy before I became pregnant with Lilly---then, I got pregnant and I quit losing half of my hair every shower. It was fantastic!! No more clogged drains or loose hairs EVERYWHERE I went. Then, a few weeks after I had her--I went back to shedding like crazy, but WORSE!

These are the parts of parenting they keep a secret!! In the end though it is definitely worth it!

Beth said...

I, too, have the baby bangs, and am still trying to grow them out to "normal" length. And my little girl is 17 months old. :( I somehow lucked out and had "baby bangs" ALL OVER MY HEAD. Seriously, there was new growth everywhere. Which is good unless it's in a big clump on each side of my head. No ponytails for me for a few months while they grow out.

Terri said...

You are tooooo funny!

Leah said...

Ahh I totally relate to the shedding. I have to sweep after I blow dry my hair because of the hair loss. Craig commented the other day on all the drawers in our bathroom being full of hair from it falling out into the drawers when I'm looking for stuff in them. Perri always has a hand full of hair in her hands from it falling on her and I notice it's always between my boobs from falling out into my shirt. I was reading on some blog about losing the hair and how it was like a Golden Retriever shedding. hahahah. Craig and I found this hilarious. #1 I lose loads of hair, #2 we have a Golden Retriever and know how much DANG hair those things shed. Pretty funny. Now the bangs though? Is that what I have to look forward to?? Oh motherhood...

Amanda said...

This didn't happen with my first, but its coming on strong with my second! I thought I was dying, seriously. I have whispys everywhere, I feel like I'm balding because its all falling out.. I'm so glad I'm not alone! YOU MADE MY DAY!

SassyMomma said...

I'm right there with you! My "baby" turned 18 months today... My hair is STILL growing back! To make matters worse, I have very curly hair. SO mine really don't do anything but fly ALL over the place, resulting in me really wearing a head band ALL the time! HaHa!! I really lost all the hair in the front. All the way around, to my "sideburns"! SO believe me when I say I feel your pain! HaHa!! =)

Kelly said...

My son is now about to turn 18 months old, and not only did I get those, but now they are so lovely and literally stick up whenever I try to fix my hair. I have to use hair spray to hold them back into a ponytail bc they aren't long enough to be called real bangs yet, but they are no longer the fringy baby bangs, they just stick straight up. Niceeee!

Megan said...

This was hilarious! Now, I do not have a child but I have heard numerous stories about a woman's hair after the baby is here. I wonder if there is any way to avoid it?!?! Well, if it makes you feel better I have always thought your hair looks great in every picture!

Sarah Fries said...

I'm so glad I'm not the only one sporting a dirty ponytail with a newborn! You can always count on me for making you feel better about yourself! I pretty much do everything different from those perfect, put-together moms!

Also, your bangs are hardly noticeable! You are being too hard on yourself!!!

Kelly said...

Join the not so fun 'hair after Baby' club.

My son will be FOUR next week and my hair is STILL falling out. (lucky for me I have TONS of hair, so I don't miss it much)
But I am right there with you on finding it EVERYWHERE!!!
In fact...once when C was just a couple months old, a strand of my hair wrapped itself around his toe. It was a mess. So bad that we had to call the doctor about it. His poor little toes were turning purple. (YIKES, so SCARY) My awesome husband had the patience to get it off of him, but it was not easy. After that incident I was ready to cut all my hair off. (I did NOT)
I will have to locate the picture of his toe(s) and post it for you.
GOOD LUCK with the new "do"!!!

Katie said...

I seriously had the worst case of baby bangs EV-ER!! I'm so not looking forward to that again...ughh! I never really noticed that I lost that much hair. I have super thick hair normally, so much so that I *HAVE* to Chi it and use a million products to keep it down (but then I always end up teasing the crown for height...I'm sure that's just stupid...I think I'm doubling my work load! haha!) Anyway, I totally agree with you that our little babies are worth baby bangs! ;o)

Emily said...

Good thing I am pregnant again and taking my prenatal vitamins. Ha!

You seriously made me go check my forehead... but nothing.

You crack me up!

Jill said...

that was very funny! i can hear you yelling to josh that you are going bald!!
you are right, you do have some "baby bangs!" i don't notice them when you wear your hair like you normally do! it kind of does look like dad got his weedeater...or scissors and gave you quite the trim!! but you still look great! :)

Jeremiah & Lindsey Kindy said...

oh my this is so funny. i never had that with colson, but my hair is falling out now, i shed more than normal with this pregnancy, but i kinda enjoy some of it falling out, it really cuts down on the drying time! i have heard of several people refer to themselves having "baby bangs".. hang in there, it will grow back!

now that i think about it, i wonder if nursing causes that. i have a client who nursed for almost a year had the same thing happen. ill be reading your comments to see if people that are experiencing this breast fed or bottle fed!

Julia said...

I have never commented before but just had to after this post b/c the same thing happened to me after all 4 of my pregnancies. I seriously thought with my first the same thing - I am going bald!!! Of course none of my other friends had this experience so I really thought something was wrong with me. After the second baby and a lot of time spent on google I realized it is a pretty common thing. Since I have been either pregnant or nursing the last 4 years my hair is having a severe identity crisis. Once it starts to finally grow back in and be somewhat normal the baby comes and boom it falls out AGAIN. You are totally right though - these sweet babies are SOOOO worth it!!!

Julee said...

I just don't want anyone to think I cut or caused those weedeater bangs! :) But I do enjoy the thinner hair while foiling! Man this post made me laugh!

MELISSA said...

hahaha.. i loved this post. i loved how you worded it all.. hilarious! :)

i am, however, starting to worry. i already have pretty thin hair. and i shed a lot now.
what in the world will my hair look like after a baby???!!??

The Timbs Clan said...

LOL I totally love this entry!! WHY you ask well I had 3 babies back to back they are now 3,2, and 1 and well I went through the hair thing each time except with babies 1 and 2 it didnt last as long because I would get pregnant again pretty fast BUT with baby number 3 who is now one I still have BAD hair! It got so bad this time that I wanted to shave it all off..LOL But instead I decided to go to a place in Rogers to give me a pick me up I wanted a hair trim to give me a little boost in the Im pretty department WELL the guy ended up cutting my hair ALL off!!! That was in October and my hair is still not past my shoulders!! YUCK so I walked out feeling uglier and not prettier! SO now Im still looking for a new hair dresser!! Do you know of a good one!!LOL
So hang in there it wont last forever.

Heather said...

This post was so hilarious! I know you are still GORGEOUS, despite any hair "issues"! You made me laugh today!!! :) Only us girls can understand all these pregnancy/baby things that happen to us!

Becca said...

Seriously I have HANDFULS of hair everytime I shower since I had my baby - I'm OVER it!

Julie said...

currently dealing with baby bangs, here too! how funny.

Katy S said...

Hilarious!!!! I am laughing so hard at this.

Great to know other momma's have the baby hair. But then you walk down the street and see those pre-baby beauties with the most gorgeous hair ever. Oh and worse you see a momma and her hair too is gorgeous!!!

I just tell myself the true MOMMA's get the baby hair!!
If you pass that girl on the street that now has really flat, super straight, reseeding hair. Thats just me! ha!

Katie said...

Work those bangs, girl!!

Rebecca (Sam's wife) said...

I have them too and have the same complaints...I got them on the sides too, so it looks like i have side burns now that they are growing out! i feel your pain too!! I got tomorrow to get my hair done...we'll see what girl says about my hair...she said the same thing as julee though.

Superchikk said...

I shed heavily anyway (Julee can attest to the thickness of my hair too), but after C was born it got crazy. I literally had to clean the shower drain every time I showered or else Husband would end up standing ankle-deep in water because the drain was so clogged. Gross? Yes. Worth it? Absolutely!

GREG and JANICE said...

Oh my gosh, Jennifer. This is hilarious! I'm sure you still look beautiful. Thanks for the good laugh though! You're a really good writer.

darnold23 said...

Okay I'm sorry, but this is just too funny! I laughed out loud reading it. Thanks for sharing your crisis.

Harris Family said...

I am laughing out loud and almost in tears thinking about the day my hair starts falling out! I know what you mean about the dirty poney tail. I was trying to remember the last day I washed my heair...yep...can't remember!!! I opt for the nap of the clean do, too! Yikes...I know the hair loss is coming! You pull off the weedeater cut well! It IS so worth it all!

Emily and Patrick said...

My little guy is five months and my hair falls out in chunks too! Disgusting... it hasn't started growing back in though...

MomApoo said...

Are you on a blogcation, Jenn?

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